The Color Conflict Tale
Jeff Evans

Papa Bear Awards 20052005 Papa Bear Awards - First Place
Best Songfic/Poerty

I posted this verse to the SmartGroups Hoganís Heroes list during one of the exchanges of messages about the color of Colonel Hoganís Jacket. Is it black? Is it brown?


As a member of the color deficient vision crowd, I say Ö color is in the eye of the beholder!


With my sincerest apologies to Theodor S. Geisel Ö




On a day in mid-August, as hot as a fire,

Colonel Hogan took me to the barbed wire.

For a while he stood silent. Then finally he said

With a very sad shake of his hat covered head.

"As you know, on this side of the wire we are Brunts.

On the far other side of this wire live the Blunts."

Then Hogan said, "It's high time that you knew

Of the terribly horrible words that Blunts spew.

In every Blunt house and in every Blunt shack,

Every Blunt claims my jacket is very much black!

But we Brunts, as you know, when we all sit around,

We all say," Hogan said, "that my jacket is brown.

That's the right honest hue!" Hogan leaned on the fence.

"So you can't trust a Blunt who spreads this nonsense!

That's why we have Kathy, with fire in her eyes,

To dispel all those horribly terrible Blunt lies.

We bicker and argue, the Blunts and the Brunts,

To prove who is righter, for all and for once.

The SmartGroups forum was busy with emails that flew,"

Hogan smiled, "at least none of them claims it was blue.

The conflict subsided, to no list members' care.

Then one day a message spoke of the hue of my hair!"

Hogan sighed, "So you pay the Blunts just no never mind.

I only just wish we were all color-blind."


Text and original characters copyright 2004 by Jeff Evans

This copyright covers only  original material and characters, and in no way intends to infringe upon the privileges of the holders of the copyrights, trademarks, or other legal rights, for the Hogan's Heroes universe.